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 So upset..... :(

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PostSubject: So upset..... :(   Fri Jul 13 2007, 14:14

I want to cry, and scream, and throttle my dad's ex! I swear if I ever saw her, I'd be sleeping in a jail cell!! angryfire angryfire angryfire angryfire angryfire

Ok, the beginning. My brother gave me his old phone recently, and I found a charger for it yesterday. Charged it up, and it had a sim in it already. Nosey old me looked at the messages, adn teh first one I see is from me, on the 7th of sept 04 at 2am, a few hours after my dad died, saying 'I love you dad xxxxx Gem xxxxx' Obviously I knew he couldn't get it but I just did it, I was upset.

Anyway, figured it was my dads old phone. There were tonnes of messages, to and from him, and memos he'd written, the sound of his voice on the voice dialing thing etc.



Went into his inbox and found messages from his ex (they split a week before he died.) They were dated the 5th of sept (day before he died) at 10:30ish pm, so just hours before his heart attack(s). Coinicidence? I think not. She's the reason he had a heart attack. You may be thinking 'hang on a sec' but wait until you see the messages.

'You f*uck. You know i'm not a druggy. Be watching over your shoulder always, cause I'm gonna be there. You'll never have a successful relationship ever again. I'm ringing two people in the morning. The first the police, the second the tax man, I'll f*ck you up.'

and

'Prepare for war. You are f*cked. I'm gonna make your life a misery. That's my life vow, you f*cker!'

This was just hours before he had a heart attack. Now think it's a coincidence? No way! She killed my dad! I hope she still has the same number, because she will not get away with that! Because of her, 2 young children lost their dad, my son has forgotten him and won't know what a star he was. My daughter will never have the honour of meeting him. I've lost my dad and it's her fault!

From the other messages there were, it's clear that she had cheated on him with his friend, and she was in fact on drugs. There were messages from my dad saying he just wanted her to be careful, not to mess her life up.

There was also a memo that shocked me to the core.

'Learn to stay calm. Walk away. Even if you're angry be the bigger one. Stop your past affecting your future. Don't do anything to hurt your partner, until they do it to you. Your dad ruined enough lives, don't let him ruin yours anymore. '

That broke my heart. He was obviously so miserable and didn't tell anyone. He was always the life and soul of the party, and always kept a brave face on. I thought he'd kind of made up with his dad. He used to go round on sundays to see them. He died a few years ago. I know what he meant. He was a horrible father, who loved his daughters too much iyswim. angryfire

I don't know what to do with all this! How can I just ignore it? She's the reason I sit and cry nearly every night. The reason my kids will be at a disadvantage for not having him in their lives.

God I hate her so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What am I supposed to do with this info? My heads all over tha place at the minute. I just want to find out where she lives and kill her!!!!!!!!!!

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PostSubject: Re: So upset..... :(   Fri Jul 13 2007, 16:02

OMG No Gem.....I'm SO sorry hug hug hug hug - I had no idea you were going through all this......to say you're having a sh*tty time at the moment would be a massive understatement hun, I so feel for you.

I obviously can't empathise with what you're going though but my only advice would be PLEASE to not do anything stupid - I know you wouldn't really as you realise the consequences for your children.

Is "she" someone you're likely to ever see again hun?......Was she around at all after your dad died.

We have all I'm sure been guilty of saying downright horrible things to partners on the spur of the moment that we'e later regretted - I've said some downright evil things before out of anger but luckily for me the consequences haven't been that the person I've said them to has them had a heart attack. She may be living with things that she said and did (I obviously don't know her and you'd therefore know far better than me whether she's the kind of person that would be affected by what she said to your Dad?) only she actually knows completely what was going on.

I don't know if any of that helps at all - I doubt it as I really didn't know what to say when I read your post hun Sad

DON'T do anything rash will you - take time to take stock of everything.....hearing and reading what you have will undoubtedly have been a tremendous shock.

Sending you lots of love and (((hugs))))

E xxxxx

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PostSubject: Re: So upset..... :(   Fri Jul 13 2007, 17:10

Thank Emma. I still don't know what I'm going to do. She's a nasty piece of work and went off with his best friend days after he died.

She lives in Liverpool but stays here for months of the year. I want to find out her address, and see if the number she sent these from is still her number, then decide what to do.

I won't do anything stupid enough to effect my kids, but I do want to mess with her and scare her. Just need to think of something good! lol

My dad was only 43. There's no way the heart attack was caused by drinking or smoking or any of that he was still young. There's no doubt the stress of her cheating and threatening him caused him stress, and those messages tipped him over the edge. No doubt in my mind she caused his heart attack.


She came up to me at his funeral saying how much he loved me and he was a lovely bloke, all the time knowing it was her fault we were all there. Then went off with his best friend, got pregnant by him just a few days after! She even hit on my 18 year old brother!!!

I'm getting angry again now. I won't be rash, I'll be clever. lol Don't get mad, get even. I so want to hurt her and make her suffer for what she's done. I hate feeling so out of control! There's nothing I can do that will make her hurt as much as I am. Sad

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PostSubject: Re: So upset..... :(   Fri Jul 13 2007, 17:55

OMG! that's horrible..dont know what to say ... really sorry
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PostSubject: Re: So upset..... :(   Tue Jul 17 2007, 15:58

How are things now Gem? hug .....Have been thinking of you!

E xxxx

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PostSubject: Re: So upset..... :(   Tue Jul 17 2007, 17:13

I think I've calmed down a bit now, but I'm not letting it drop. Not sure what I'm going to do yet though. Probably find out where she lives and put peroxide in her shampoo or permanent dye in her foundation! Pmsl!

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